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Ivanabitch Coconut Flavored Vodka, commonly known as “Nectar of the Guards,” referring to the loin-clothed native guards who once held Dmitri Ivanabitch captive on an island somewhere in the South Pacific, was the result of a successful attempt on the part of Dmitri to distract his jailers.
Pouring his last flask of Ivanabitch Vodka into the nearly empty gourd of an island coconut, he was able to make good his escape—pausing just long enough to jot down the important bits of the recipe.
Now you too can enjoy the clean crisp taste that so enchanted the stupid naked savages! So, just sit back, relax and…hold on. Are those war drums we hear in the distance?
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